Thank goodness April is here.

I just reread my last post about March getting off to a great start.  I find it a little funny how positive I sounded.  March turned out to be one of the most dismal months I've ever lived through.


But before I get into that, my friend, Leanna, and her daughter, Azaleia, came to visit me in early March.  The highlights included a trip to the Udvar-Hazy Air and Space Museum, our Anne of Green Gables marathon, and our visit to Jessica T., a mutual friend of ours. Thank you for coming, Leanna.  We had so much fun with you!


Also, I went to traffic court with my brother-in-law, Ken, as my lawyer.  He did such a good job proving my innocence in the pre-trial discussions with the prosecutor, that we didn't even have to go to trial!  I loved it when the judge said, "you are free to go."   Thank you, Ken, for lightening my burden. 


Things started to go downhill when Ie Ling came up with other plans for employment.  Mi Na and Mei Li caught a stomach bug, I had a urinary tract infection and really bad allergies.  Steve was busy at work.  But most of all, I was overcome by a deep sadness, which source thankfully lies outside of my husband and children.  But the sadness devoured me.  And all the rest just made it really difficult for me to function.  


I guess the story isn't complete without me announcing, probably a bit too early, that I'm nine weeks pregnant.  I am really, truly happy about it, but it is weird how much of a burden such happy news is for the first few months when you consider the vomiting and exhaustion.  


One of my dearest friends, Heather S., once said that she could picture her unborn children rooting for her to pull through hard times and make good choices.  I believe their exact words were, "Come on, Mom! We need you!"


So yesterday afternoon, while my children watched TV and I rested on the couch, I felt something stir within me.  It was certainly too early for me to feel this baby move, but it was a reminder that this little one is counting on me to pull through the sadness and sickness.  And so were my three little couch potatoes.  I felt this overwhelming love for these little people and started to cry.  I knew I needed to close my sad chapter, especially when the circumstances are completely out of my control.


I woke up before my kids this morning and took a shower for the first time in four days.  I put on some makeup and got dressed.  I didn't do my hair, but I'm taking baby steps here.


I took the kids to the mall for some shopping.  I purchased two knit maxi skirts and a pair of lounge pants for comfort.  I purchased an Easter dress for Mei because sewing something is out of the question at this point.  Mi Na's Easter dress will come from the pile of new hand-me-downs.  Stephen said he didn't want new clothes for Easter.  I purchased $7 sunglasses for me so I could feel like a new woman.  I bought Mei Li the fedora just because she asked me to, and I didn't see a reason not to.  


We bought lunch at the food court, went on a carousel ride, and ended our trip with cupcakes.  It wasn't a totally smooth outing, but I'll count getting out of the house as a victory.  

I still feel like junk physically, but I know it is temporary, and I have never, even through March 2012, lost sight of how truly blessed I am.  

Still not over

For five days, Mei Li took several naps a day, had to be carried almost everywhere, and only consumed Gatorade and water.

On Monday, I was thrilled to see this:

Mei Li was pretending to be a ballerina! She hadn't touched her toys or dress-ups for so long and it just made me so happy to see her smiling and playing again.



Well, now it's Stephen's turn. He got the bug and he's been unable to keep any food or liquid down. He's been lying down whenever and wherever he can and he wants me to hold him all the time. I kind of love that. He took a couple of naps today and watched Cars. Mei Li seems all better, except for the pink eye part!

When both Stephen and Mi Na were napping, I weeded our garden and put mulch down (finally!). Mei Li helped me a little, but she mostly played in the sun and built a dirt castle. At one point she said, "Ah! Spring is good!" Spring is good. I loved being out in the warm sun gardening. Spring will get even better once we're through with the sickness and tax season.

When I put Mei Li to bed tonight, I asked her to pray. She prayed this sweet prayer:

Dear Heavenly Father,

Please bless that Stephen won't be sick anymore and that he won't get anyone else sick.

Please do it now.

Please help him to get better.

Haven't you ever done that? When something is so hard that you just need Heavenly Father to put a stop to it right this instant! Mei Li wasn't in any pain herself, but she sure does care a lot about her little brother and his well-being. I love that little girl.

I just really hope that Mi Na doesn't get sick. While I'm at it, can I not get sick? Steve too?

I'm going to count gardening as my workout for the day. That and running up and down the stairs a gagillion times for laundry. I'm wiped. I'm going to bed now.

Here's what's going on.

You probably don't want to pay us a visit for about a week or so. Mei Li has been very ill. Yesterday, she vomited several times throughout the day, took three naps, and went to bed at 5:00 PM!

We watched The Sound of Music together yesterday morning. She would run to the bathroom every so often and throw up (sometimes she didn't make it). In the middle of the movie, she said she didn't want to watch anymore.

She went upstairs to drink an ounce of Gatorade. Then she asked if I would put the movie on again so she could listen to it while she slept. I did just that, and she fell asleep.


It was kind of warm yesterday so I suggested we all go outside for some air. I wrapped the invalid in a blanket and put her on a chair outside. She reminded me very much of cousin Clara from Heidi.


Today at least she is not vomiting, but she has a high fever. She has not eaten anything for two days, but today she is keeping down liquids, which I am grateful for.

I have loved tending to Mei Li's needs. I've been carrying her up and down stairs, singing her songs, bringing her juice, and wrapping her up in blankets. I made her a heart-shaped piece of toast, but she only ate two bites.

As nice as it is to coddle my first born, I want to see her joyful smile again. Mei Li, come back to us! We miss you!

Stephen was doing great until he went on our deck today without shoes and got a splinter in his heel that he will not let me remove. He walked on tip-toes for the rest of the day. I'm going to operate while he's asleep tonight.

Mi Na is runny, slobbery, and sleepless because her second tooth is coming in. She is remarkably chipper considering.

Steve is coming home very late these days, and I've felt overwhelmed at times. But this will pass, hopefully before I drown in my never-ending pile of laundry and sewing projects.

Thursday

Thursday was meh. I went to visit teach Heidi in the morning. I nursed Mi Na there and when she was done, she barfed all over herself, me, and on Heidi's couch. "Hey Heidi, is there anything I can do for you? How about I give your family the stomach flu?" I felt horrible.

Poor Mi Na was so tired. No kicking, no smiling, no reaching, no grabbing. I gave her a bath and put her on the ground to change her clothes. There was a cloth headband six inches from her face, and she just stared at it. She didn't grab it and put it in her mouth like she would on a normal day.

I held her and sang to her and she rested her head against my chest. I put her down in her crib and she closed her eyes right away. Poor, sick, tired little girl.

I kept Mei home from preschool just in case she had the bug too. I put Stephen down for his nap shortly after Mi Na. I wanted to be close to the kids just in case anything went wrong so Mei and I curled up in my bed with our portable DVD player and watched "Care Bears." The room was filled with sunlight and I drifted in and out of sleep. It was wonderfully relaxing. Not too much later, Stephen joined us. It was so nice to be all snuggled together.

I made roasted butternut squash soup (my new favorite) for dinner and at one point had three children crying/screaming loudly at me. There's really nothing to do in those moments, but endure and get food in their tummy as quickly as possible.

There were struggles to get them to try new things, but in the end I'm content that they both tried a tiny bit. They filled the rest of their tummies with bell peppers and cheese. Crazy kids.

Steve came home around 7:45 and he took over bed time while I went to Rebekah's to get my haircut. I felt impulsive and told her to cut bangs. So far, I'm not regretting my impulse.


It was kind of late when I got home. Neither of us had any juice left for 90 minutes of Yoga X. So we went to sleep. You know, so Thursday was just meh.

Friday

We're going on day three of being at home sick. I'm sick of it. It's kinda fun at first, but I'm done with staying inside.

We did manage to have a little (very little) fun today, and I owe it all to my kids. Mei Li slid down the stairs in her fuzzy candy cane pajamas and taught Stephen to do it too.

After all of that, I had to get out of the house. I bundled them up in their fuzzy pajamas, fleece slippers, hats, gloves, jackets, and blankets, and put them in the stroller for a short jog. It felt so good to be outside in the misty cold.


I love the fall. I think it's my favorite season. That's a new thing. Growing up in southern California, I didn't have an appreciation for fall because I didn't notice it come and go. It kind of looked like summer and winter. While living in VA, I've learned to celebrate what each season has to offer. I love it here.

Tonight, Steve and I left the kids at home with Brighten, and we went out to dinner with his two younger sisters, Rachel and Christine. We love having them here. Christine is out here doing internship interviews, which means she may be out here soon too. We feel incredibly blessed.

Can't you see that it's just rainin'? There ain't no need to go outside.

My kids were sick on this rainy day, so we stayed inside in our pajamas all day long.

My sister-in-law Rachel has been our temporary tenant for the past few days and the kids adore her, as do I. Each day, Rachel is their first request of the morning. She'll be living in the area permanently and we couldn't be happier.

Mei Li missed her art class yesterday and joy school today and might miss a birthday party tomorrow because of her cold. Lame. I'm praying that she'll be better by tomorrow.

Today, I tried to make up for her missed art class by doing some art projects at home. Mei Li has been wanting to make snowflakes, and Stephen's nap time was the perfect time for such a project.


Do you know how nervous it makes me to watch a 3-year-old use scissors?
Her scissors were not quite strong enough to cut through several layers of paper so she just cut up a scrap of paper.

She wanted to hang up the snowflakes, but since it's not winter yet, I suggested that we cut up fall leaves to stick on our window.

I cut out a bunch of leaves and let her do the sticking. I thought that letting a 3-year-old do it would ensure pure randomness.

I was so wrong:



It turned into more of a leaf filing system.


It reminded me of my attempt at a totally random and asymmetrical photo wall collage:


She is indeed my daughter.

Like I said before, we were in our pajamas all day long. It felt good, especially since my pajama pants were expertly made by a seamstress in Korea. They are comfortable and beautiful and perfect for rainy sick days.


Tonight, Stephen played "burger stand" like he does every night. He pokes his head out through the mini blinds and asks "a burger?" If you say yes, then he'll turn around and pretend to fix up your burger. THEN, he doesn't just hand you the burger, but he walks out from behind his stand and hands it to you. What great customer service!

Mei Li played it cool just before bed.


And now I just want to be with Steve. Good night.